I actually dated someone shortly after my divorce. Were together for a solid two-and-a-half, three years. I felt like that whole time I was just defending myself.
The smile is genuine, and me smiling and being surprised is genuine,” Basra said. They went on a date of their own and kept in touch after the show premiered, despite living on opposite sides of the country (he in L.A. and she in New York), but became serious once Basra moved to L.A. Basra added that things got more serious once they quarantined together in March, and that’s when she decided to go public with the relationship.
How Dating My Reality Show Director Opened Me Up To A Real Relationship
“It was very taboo for people to be dating and not have marriage as the end goal,” she explains. However, Gurki also admits that she had doubts about their relationship early on, which Justin latches onto. “Who says yes to getting married, and you have doubts?!” he asks, confounded. “This is called culture clash,” she responds, reiterating that he doesn’t understand what it was like to be in her position. “We have baggage from past relationships we’re working through—all that fun stuff. It’s a cute and fun story, but there’s a lot of work in the day-in, day-out. It’s a grown-ass relationship.”
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I can honestly say after being with James, I was meant to be on the show… to learn not only that I want a relationship and love, but to learn what I want love to look like for me. My New York lease was ending in May 2019, and I didn’t quite know what I wanted to do with my life aside from continuing to get to know James. I was a bit burnt out from New York life, and I have family in California.
They had an arranged marriage and are very different, but to this day are still together. Even with their faults, I admire how dedicated they are to ensuring they continue to make their partnership work. Those values have influenced me deeply and what I am looking for in a partner. I didn’t realize at the time that he lived in L.A.
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The more I got to know about him, the more I fell in love. Not only is he a dad, he’s a director who started as a cinematographer/DP. He’s been to many parts of the world (I mean who the hell goes to Everest multiple times?) and has done many important documentaries about cultural and societal issues. He’s Black, which fuels his drive to work on projects that can make an impact in the world. He grew up with a lot of uncertainty in his family life. While the other guys seemed to understand that and even complimented her for being honest, Justin couldn’t let it go.
It takes a long time, and I don’t think I really understood that until recently. I’m getting messages from women saying the same thing as you are, like, “How do you get over it? ” Anyone that didn’t really make me feel great about my choice, I just had to put on pause, like even my parents — I stopped talking to them for a solid six months. I changed my number, and the only person who had my number is my brother.
James is a very hands-off and serious director. He’s a documentary filmmaker, so reality TV is not his shtick. He just happened to sign onto Dating Around through a friend of a friend and thought it could be a fun project. The whole time we filmed I was thinking, God, this guy is so serious.
Today, Basra credits that date from hell with leading to her current relationship—with none other than Dating Around’s director, James Adolphus. Who just lays into a girl like that about being divorced on a first date? Especially after he told her he made Smash app how to see who likes you on without paying an ex get rid of her cat and then broke up with her. I wonder why, she seemed to really like the goofball guy. While Gurki seems to have put her date with Justin in the back of her mind, she decided not to pursue any of her other potential suitors.
This is a very different attitude I had when I went on Dating Around. At that time, I was still very cynical about dating, and that’s taken a long time for me to break out of. Falling in love with James made me realize I am capable of love, and there are plenty of fish in the sea. Being in each other’s face all day long, with quarantine and curfew, makes you realize quickly if you can tolerate someone long term because you don’t have the space for pretense. You have to keep it real 100% of the time or shit is not going to work!
We have mainly been living in the moment doing fun things like museums, cooking, trivia, etc. Brad changed his bio “every homosexual’s wet dream,” which is a descriptor Lex used on their date — Brad wasn’t picked for a second date, but that quote is a pretty good consolation prize. Amber and Gary were part of Teen Moms OG and they fought… Whether the cameras were there filming or not, they fought.
